Since I have become a teacher I have laughed so hard that tears ran down my face. My students say the funniest things! I wish I had written these things down earlier because I definately can't remember them. As I remember them and as they happen, I will be sure to add them to this post.
Me: D, you are crazy.
DW: (Looks at me) What about you?
Student: I hate white people.
Me: You hate white people? I'm white and you don't hate me.
Student: You're white?
Me: Who is George Washington?
Student: The first white president!
Co-worker: Wow Mrs. Hainey you are amazing with the Smartboard.
Student: Yeah, she got skills.
Student: Look Mrs. Hainey, I finished!
Me: Good job, do it one more time!
Student: Aw crap!
Me: What are some reasons that people go to the doctors?
KB: To get a colonoscopy
Lies I've told my students:
1. I am 99 years old
2. I can see their brains through their ears.
3. The holiday elf watches to see if we are behaving or not.
4. I have magic dust in my pocket to heal minor injuries.
5. I am allergic to oranges and cannot help them peel.
6. If I am wearing angry eyes I will get wrinkles, and Mr. Hainey does not want me to have wrinkles.
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